The Thing Marvel Two-In-One 61 t0 63: Starhawk, Moondragon, Warlock
In a dock in New York City a strange cocoon fished out of the waters bursts open.
What is inside is six and a half feet tall, gorgeous as hell, cosmically powered and will take Ben grim to an adventure in space.
Here she is bursting in on Ben and Alicia's romantic dinner.
Her name isn't 'she' but it's close. Her name is HER. Yup, 'Her'. Which makes her counterpart Adam Warlock 'Him'. Thank god Adam got a decent monicker; we'll get no luck with 'Her' who will continue to be stuck with a name that ensures she won't get her own series soon.
The name might be off but the powers are off the chart. First, she's able to pummel the Thing.
Ben actually goes through the wall with that hit.
Even more impressive, Her's power is not only destructive but creative. Here she mends the wall she just broke.
Creative/destructive ability is a signature of the Power Cosmic. Our hero is overpowered but not outclassed - Ben is also a 'product' of Cosmic ray bombardment.
Now for some back history. Look at this panel.
Here's Her (this name is giving me problems in this writeup) during her (see?) first outing going up against Hulk and Doctor Strange. Where is Her you ask? (Where is she?) She's the dark guy (Her's the dark guy). Yup, she (I mean Her) changed her gender from the previous (Dr. Strange/Hulk) story to this story so she can fuck Adam Warlock. Mmmm Hmmm. She (I mean Her) is the first (and only?) transgender Marvel character!
Since Adam Warlock is dead. She wants to fuck a dead guy. She's a transgender necromaniac. Wow, Marvel really operates on the edge.
Big problem for Ben though - Her flies off with Alicia. Strong foes are not a problem. Power blasts can be handled. But when someone flies, old Ben is reduced to standing there with his mouth open. Big problem. But not for long since we have the timely arrival of . . .
Starhawk from the original Guardians of the Galaxy (you can see the Guardian's little heads floating in the second panel above. Starhawk is a dual entity - a husband and wife in one being (I told you Marvel operated on the edge). But the important thing is Starhawk can fly. Since he's so powerful, I was expecting that he would simply lift Ben up. But the story takes
a better turn.
Starhawk and Ben break into Reed's spacecraft collection in the Baxter Building and borrow a Skrull starship.
But I'm getting ahead of the story. So Her and Alicia fly off and they land in a park where they trip somebody's "radar". That someone being the gorgeous and very insecure Moondragon. Her was literally born not yesterday but today. True to form she acts like a little kid - force blasts first, questions if anybody survives. Her reaction to Moondragon can be seen below.
She's a regular powerhouse (I mean Her).
Starhawk can't just fly, he has cosmic awareness (the same intuitive power that led Starhawk to the Baxter Building in the first place) and so is able to track Her. The Skrull ship is for later, Ben uses his trusty airbike (I love the minimalist design). Once again knee jerk reaction from Her is to attack the newcomers.
It's Starhawk vs Her. Alright!
Her proves just how powerful she is by dunking Starhawk in the river. Behind Her is Moondragon's starship. Using this ship, the three girls (Her, Alicia, and Moondragon) high-off to Counter-Earth so that Her can do the thing with Warlock. Billions of available guys on Earth and she (Her) wants the dead guy in Counter-Earth. It's a slap in the face for males everywhere. This is when Ben and Starhawk go for the Skrull ship.
As you can see, it's a classic flying saucer.
This story is about to get cosmic and really, really, good.
There's a big problem with Counter-Earth - it's missing! What the women find is the other Moon (Counter-Moon?) that used to circle Counter-Earth. Unlike our natural Moon, this Moon is actually a monitoring and control station that is inhabited by the creator of counter Earth, the High Evolutionary. The women enter and find the High Evolutionary out cold on the floor.
Actually, upon closer investigation, the High Evolutionary appears to be dead.
I'm in denial about it (and I would be justified) because this character is simply too good. The High Evolutionary started out as a scientist on Earth and he figured out how to accelerate evolution. Just like a good mad scientist he experimented with himself. Evolving himself to such an extent that he became a master of all human arts and sciences. As ultimate proof of his mastery he recreated the Earth on the other side of the sun - Counter-Earth. So what do we have with the High Evolutionary? He's the perfect human and his accomplishments are proof of human potential, plus he has a cool armored costume and c'mon his house is the Moon!
At this point the guys manage to catch up and the fight is on once again. This time the pairing is Starhawk vs. Her and Thing vs. Moondragon.
The Starhawk vs. Her fight is breathtaking.
During the battle we see the "other half" of Starhawk taking over.
This is Aleta who shares the Starhawk persona with her husband. And I thought Firestorm was the first and only such hero.
Magnificent and interesting as the Starhawk-Her fight is , the Thing vs. Moondragon fight has a better ending.
It's good to be the Thing even though Benjy is taking advantage of the fact that his girlfriend is blind (Are you touching her ass Ben? No, no, that's Starhawk spanking Her).
Thanks to Alicia, the whole thing gets sorted out.
Her has been impressing with her power levels but this is by far the most impressive display of all: Resurrecting the High Evolutionary.
The Evolutionary explains that it was Adam Warlock who killed him in a fit of anger. It is at this point that the High Evolutionary notices that his planet (Counter-Earth) is missing. Apparently stolen.
Now what kind of of Moon would the High Evolutionary have if it wasn't able to give chase?
It's not just a home, it's a mobile home.
Here's a great shot of the High Evolutionary livid at the theft of his greatest creation.
Finally we are shown just how a planet is stolen.
At this point, Starhawk changes back to the male half.
This gets me to thinking. Why does Aleta get a basic, no-design-effort-at-all costume, while Starhawk looks fantastic?
Anyway, our heroes break into the planet stealer ship and these thieves are gigantic. I love what happens next.
Increasing stature is NOT an issue with th High Evolutionary. I love it. The Thing is my favorite Marvel hero (together with
the Beast) but Ben looks like an action figure in the panel above.
The tale gets better when the High Evolutionary finds out that these thieves, who call themselves the Prime Movers of Tarkus, were hired by somebody else. So the High Evolutionary asks who "hired" these Movers.
The Beyonders! In a still more fascinating twist.
It seems that Counter-Earth is not the mirror planet that we thought it was. The fake Earth doesn't have the quality of the real McCoy. Therefore . . .
Now only one issue remains: fucking Adam Warlock.
And the dead is brought back to life.
But.
The soul of Adam Warlock resides in the Soul Gem currently on the forehead of the Elder of the Universe known as the Gardener.
Adam isn't missing out on a hot babe though because, if I remember correctly, he's got Gamora in the Soul Gem with him. It's Her that's missing out, and in the end, this extremely powerful and unique being simply flies off to space.
So this story arc becomes the jumping off point for two other possible stories in the Marvel universe. First the meeting of the High Evolutionary and the Beyonders and final fate of Counter-Earth. Second, the further adventures of Her (including a less confusing name I hope).
